Another of the questions I get asked quite often is, where's nice in RLC?" Obviously, my first answer is "On top of me!" but if that isn't what was on your mind, here are some more handy hints. So you've finally persuaded the girl / guy of your dreams to accompany you on a date, and there's a good chance that sex will be on the menu. Or your persistence has paid off, and someone has finally answered "Yes" to your repeated "Wanna f**k?" pleas. Where on Earth (or rather, where in RLC) do you take them?
Of course, you could just run to the nearest room. If that’s in the hotel, you’ll have to fight your way through the crowds of hookers and hopefuls in the hall. Now, with all due respect for my fellow working people, that is not the most romantic start to a date. And it probably smells, too. The same goes for Passions. Sure, it’s quick and easy, but you’ll end up with a crowd of people shouting advice at you. Or asking your girl / boy if they can have a go once you’ve finished. And when was the last time you saw a cleaner in there?
No, we can do far better than that. Two of my favourite places are reached by swimming through the Aquarium, which is an interesting start to the date, I’m sure you will agree. Your partner will almost certainly never have been taken anywhere before that involves avoiding a large shark.
Swim down the right hand side, under the stern of the sunken ship, and behind a large rock you will find a tunnel. Swim through that to find the mermaid caves. The rooms are accessed through holes in the cliff walls, and contain delightful shell beds and strange, drifting creatures. Use it while you can, because as you will see from one of my previous blogs, I have plans for this place!
On the other hand, you could just swim straight across to the other side of the aquarium and get out. Run round to the left, and through the waterfall, signposted “Nude Beach”. Lo and behold, your own private beach. Run in the surf! Swim. Sit in a deck chair. Make love on the large, uncomfortable-looking rock!
For something completely different, try the park. The park is located through a set of doors behind the seating area in the alley. It’s lovely. Butterflies drift around the planted areas. There’s a big hot-tub there and an even larger pool. And, over to the right are the cabins. Inside, you’ll find a seating area in front of a log fire. There are balconies with views of the sea or the mountains. I’ve spent many happy times just standing and talking on those balconies. And, of course, there’s a bed.
There’s a beautiful bedroom in the Kingdom of Hearts club, with a four poster bed and a private hot tub, but you’re not supposed to be there unless you are a member. You have been warned, and I’m not going to rescue you if you get arrested! I only know about it because I was dragged there completely against my will.
And if you are in the mood for an Olympian sex session, covering all possible options, you couldn’t do better than the rooms out the back of the Welcome Centre, which contain not only a bed, but also a lap dancing chair, a wide array of bondage equipment and a sauna / hot tub area. Just don’t wear yourself out!
Or you could visit any of the dungeons that RLC has to offer. The view isn’t up to much, but I do so love the screaming.
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